Mayhem of the Insomniac
by This Grill is not a Home
Summary: A retelling of the episode "Mayhem of the Music Meister" because who cares about originality? The skinny of it is Music Meister and Black Manta have a crush on Green Arrow, who has a crush on Batman, who really doesnt care. Aquaman has been swapped out for an OC named Blast Master, who is in a relationship with Black Canary. Lots of swearing, and wasn't taken seriously when written
1. Chapter 1

**hooo boy, i couldn't find a transcript of "Mayhem of the Music Meister" I liked so I'm typing out my own. and i decided, hey, why not write an au fic of that shit.**

 **you'll just have to see (follows the same plot, but some roles will be reversed, some characters will be replaced because im a multiship whore and i demand that every character is lgbt+, every god damned one)**

 **wow fuck this man lets get to it. pls forgive me i havent written btbatb in five years. i know im probably going to end up writing this sort of crackish because i wrote the first few paragraphs and i was like "damn son this is not what i wanted" but yolo i hope you enjoy some hit-and-miss characterization.**

The scene is complete mayhem. There are soldiers every where, rushing around trying to take down a giant robot. Some guy, probably named Derek or something, tries to hit it with a Jeep, but fails miserably when it was kicked away, and he is subsequently knocked out. Everyone thinks he totally deserved it though.

They keep on shooting the robot, knowing it is their only chance at trying to destroy it, but they are so distracted by how much of a douche Derek was being that they don't notice the robot shooting missiles at them. In the few brief moment before they slipped into unconsciousness they all think that they are almost as much as a douche as Derek was.

Inside the dinged up robot, which Black Manta is, without a doubt, already going to complain about, the three villains are all faced toward the screen showing them the outside. Clock King still has a hangover from the night before, because god damn, does a night of drinking your sorrows away over a grandfather clock wears you out, so the others decided to help him through the plan, again.

"There it is. The United Nations new comm satellite," Gorilla Grodd states. He fixes the strap on his gun while Clock King tries to remember what they were going to use it for.

They all stand there waiting for Clock King to speak up. "Oh! Which in out hands will allow us to muck up the gears of global communication.

"And create world wide chaos," Black Manta chimes in.

They all leave the robot, which Clock King is grateful for. Black Manta has filtration in his helmet, so he doesn't have to deal with the horrible stench of Gorilla Grodd, or rather as Clock King and some of the other villains like to call him, Gorilla Gross.

The three of them walk to the entrance near the rocket, but stop when they hear and irritatingly loud, booming voice from behind them.

"Looks like someone's been caught with their hands in the cookie jar!"

They had all thought that for some reason, Aquaman's voice had raised a few octaves, but when they turn around, there come face to face with Green Arrow, Black Canary, and... Someone they have never seen before.

She is tall and muscular, for one, and dwarfs the other heroes around her. Her skin is very tan, and her face is covered up by a mask which was a respirator and reflective glass. It shows the back of her head, and the thin strip of black hair. She wears a sleeveless black and orange jumpsuit and boots, and has shields on her forearms and shins that looks more like plating.

While the villains are mildly shocked by the new person, Black Canary speaks up with her witty comment **. "** A good spanking's in order for you boys."

Grodd gets riled up and pulls out his gun, aiming it at them. "Nothing will keep us from controlling that satellite, especially you."

Clock King follows suit by unsheathing his sword, which he has said once before in public and still hasn't heard the end of it from Plastic Man.

He smirks, because Green Arrow's that kind of guy, and pulls out his bow, and loads it. "Then it sounds to me like you're ready to rumble."

Black Canary and the other hero, Blast Master, get into fighting stances, while Blast Master's hands emit a dim white glow.

Black Manta pulls out his ray guns and makes it a point to aim directly at Green Arrow. "Indeed, but it is you who will take the _tumble._ "

Everyone is taken back for well more than a moment. No one moves, because this man with a deep as fuck voice just let out the most out of place note since any Disney movie.

"I'm sorry hun, but did you just sing that?" Everyone is grateful for Black Canary breaking the awkward tension that was building up. If it had kept up, they all would have grumbled some half-assed excuse and shuffled home in shame.

"Of course I did _not,_ wait yes I _did."_ Although Manta has a mask on, Green Arrow can only imagine the pure horror on the man's face.

 _"I'm sounding shrill against my will_

 _A_ _nd cannot stop this singing."_

Green Arrow muses briefly on how Black Manta has a pretty nice voice before Blast Master steps forward and starts belting out her own notes.

 _"And in my ears_

 _I swear I hear a quite distinctive ringing!"_

Gorilla Grodd pushes Manta aside who falls down to the ground while distracted by his identity crisis. _"This silly game's very lame and someone's going to pay!"_

 _"An unknown source_

 _B_ _ut where's the force_

 _T_ _hat has us in it's sway?"_

Blast Master stares adoringly at Black Canary while she sings. She swears she finds herself loving her more and more each day.

 _"Who is doing this to us_

 _A_ _nd on this we must concur."_

Manta snaps out of his trance and hops up to the other villains in a mini conference.

 _"The dastardly_

 _Despicable_

 _Disturbingly_ _inexplicable-"_

Gorilla Grodd cuts off the rest of the villains, because he's attention seeking and feels like he needs to be validated by his peers. _"And_ _immanently_ _kick-able!"_ He kicks his feet forward, as if to prove his point.

The villains and the hero form two separate lines in front of the rocket, facing each other as if they were going to square off or something. But instead, we get more non consensual singing.

 _"The dirty rotten rat is-!"_

 _"The Music Meister!"_ belts the figure who has appeared in front of the rocket.

They all decide that this man is a fucking nerd, but he's ripped as fuck for some reason, and looks like he's just stepped out a mobster painting done by the Joker, minus the disturbing ass grin that would be on every person. But they also think that he is not to be trusted, so they raise their weapons to him.

 _"Lay down your arms my friends_

 _Arrows, guns and swords."_

Their eyes fog over, and they obediently listen to the son of Elton John and the Joker. Green Arrow, Gorilla Grodd, Black Manta, and Clock King drop their weapons, and Black Canary and Blast Master relax.

 _"Your resistance to my charm now ends_

 _W_ _hen I belt these power chords!"_

The villains start pirouetting their way around the Music Meister.

Music Meister grabs Black Canary and Clock King, and pulls them into his arms.

 _"Good guys, or bad guys_

 _I_ _t doesn't really matter."_

He sets thems off to dance while he glances at Grodd leading Blast Master, and Black Manta leading Green Arrow, nodding in approval at them.

 _"You're all just slaves to my_ _hypnotic_ _patter_

 _As I regale you with my story_

 _Y_ _ou'll know you have no choice_

 _B_ _ut to do my evil bidding_

 _W_ _hen you hear this booming voice!"_

They traverse over to the control room, the pairs dancing all the way over. It takes longer than necessary since the pairs all decided to do a dip, Green Arrow and Black Manta's more so than the others.

Music Meister can't blame them though. His hypnotism often subtly makes them do what they desire most. He doesn't count on Green Arrow and Clock King getting onto Grodd and Blast Master's shoulders to lift him up into the air. He applauds Black Canary and Manta's freakish upper body strength since they each only use one arm to hold themselves up almost completely horizontally.

 _"Oh, I'm the Music Meister."_

 _"He's the Music Meister."_ They all chime in.

 _"And everyone just fawns."_

He's controlled people on purpose many a times, but usually one, or two. Never six. He finds is weird how they're malleable under his words, like play-dough. He would say clay, but fuck, unless you heat that shit up, you'd need a jack hammer to break it. Or at least in his experience its been like that.

 _"He's the Music Meister,"_

They all scramble to be Music Meister's stepping stool to the floor.

 _"And we are all his pawns."_

Music Meister ballonly leaps over to the control panel and activates it.

 _"And so for me it's destiny_

 _T_ _o be the meistro of villainy,"_

He leads the others, who are in a line dance, out of the building once the hatch on the rocket was released.

 _"I'm the Music Meister_

 _A_ _nd I'm here to settle the score!_

You see, I too have plans for this rocket, and now that I've established who's in charge, get to work."

Off to a distance, Batman sits back in the batcopter, watching the scene go down, and doing absolutely nothing, because everyone knows Batman waits until the last fucking possible moment to save the day. "Well, that's not something you see every day," he comments.

As his slaves pulled the staircase up the rocket, Music Meister continued to sing, because whether or he's doing something, he is in the middle of musical number.

 _"Bullies used to pick on me because I sang in choir_

 _But something very strange occured when I kept singing higher_

 _The ruffians quickly fell into a trance_

 _A_ _nd it was then with wicked glee_

 _I made those puppets dance_

 _I'm the Music Meister!"_

 _"He's the Music Meister."_

 _"And everyone just fawns."_

 _"He's the Music Meister,"_

They pass up the Meister's orb to the Blast Master, who attached it to the rocket.

 _"And we are all his pawns!"_

 _"I'm the Music Meister_

 _C_ _rime became my path."_

 _"He's the Music Meister_

 _A_ _nd we must beware his wrath."_

As soon as Meister hears the first note of that deep voice ring out, he is ensnared. He is expecting maybe the walking hazard warning to be the one to sing it, but no, when he looks over, it is the Robin Hood wanna be. Regardless of gender his voice caught him. "That voice. It's beautiful." He jumps off the room to to Green Arrow.

" _Oh oooooh."_

Green Arrow is delighted by the attention he was getting from his master, even in the back of his mind he noted how creepy that sounded.

 _"Ah aaaaah."_

Meister starts walking towards.

 _"Oh oooooh."_

Green Arrow hops over the staircase edge, and walks towards him as well. He doesn't notice a Black Canary behind him getting red in the face and clutching her hands.

 _"Ah aaa-aah."_

 _"Oh-"_ Before Music Meister can finish getting out his note, Black Canary runs forwards and sings in attempts to prove herself to Music Meister.

 _"Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa!"_ Her sonic voice activates, and knocks everyone over.

Batman watches it unfold, and still does nothing. "The feind, his voice can hit a pitch that can hypnotically controls anyone who hears it." He slips in earplugs before finally jumping down and doing something other than bumming around and getting his kick off to watching a group of people sing. "Your concerto of crime is over!"

Music Meister stands up and dusts his over sized coat off. "Batman... I'm sorry, but my work's not quite done yet." He shoots, believe it or not, fucking music bars out of a microphone staff.

Batman dodges them and grabs him by the front of his ridiculous coat.

 _"You better tow the line you see_

 _B_ _ecause your wills belong to me,"_

Everyone who had fallen down slowly stand up, and start snapping their fingers, like they are in some sort of cheesy gangster movie, which isn't surprising considering Music Meister's current clothing style.

 _"And now my friends_ _you have the chance_

 _T_ _o show Batman how well you dance_

 _Mwahahahaha!"_

Batman tosses Music Meister aside, because Batman's all about the fighting and doesn't care if the villain gets away, and, of I don't know, sets the rocket to launch, or something like that.

Music Meister takes to opportunity to escape into the control room and do just that, because Batman really doesn't think these things through.

Black Manta does a grand jeté to Batman. He isn't sure why he does this instead of attacking, but damn does it look nice.

Batman grabs him by his antennas and hurls him straight into Green Arrow.

Black Canary and Clock King both go after him at the same time, Canary spinning her way to Batman, and Clock King doing a slightly less impressive grand jeté, and then going straight into an entrechat.

Batman swipes his foot under Canary and knocks her over like a sad house plant who has lost all meaning in their life. He immediately jumps up and kicks Clock King in the face. Before he can land, Grodd wraps his arms around him.

Music Meister, inside of the control, sets the rocket to launch in 30 seconds. Normally, one would scold him for not setting it off immediately, but the devious songster has another card up his sleeve, much like his maybe-father.

Gorilla Grodd dances with Batman squeezed in his grip like some loser with a life-size barbie, cause I totally didn't do that, no way.

Batman squirts lube- I mean oil on the ground, causing Grodd to slip, fall, and slide, while Batman rides his like a surfboard. Like, for real, and actually fucking gorilla surfboard how cool would that be.

Black Canary and Green Arrow try to clothesline him, but Batman duck under their arms and handcuff them together. Unfortunately, it is not with fuzzy handcuffs, but with the cold, hard steel of justice. And by that I mean bat shaped handcuffs because Batman is a nerd.

He jumps off of Grodd right before he hits the wall, but unfortunately for him, the gorilla recovers quickly and holds him in place by his upper arms and calves.

Black Manta, Blast Master, and Clock King approach him. Blast Master decides to make the shortcut and does a poorly executed jeté entrelacé . She goes to punch Batman, but he moves out of the way, and she hits Grodd instead.

Batman almost pities him when he hears the 'oof' and the sound of flesh sizzling. Once released, he tackles Blast Master out of the way. He looks up to find himself being circled by the others, and fire bursting out of the rocket.

Music Meister comes out of a hatch on the roof of the control room.

 _"Now that Batman's been delayed_

 _Y_ _our usefulness has passed_

 _A distraction is what I need_

 _S_ _o kick into that blast."_

Everyone, minus Batman, lines us and does the can-can in the direction of the fire.

 _"Oooh ooooo-ooooh_

 _I'm the Music Meiste_ _r_ _, I cannot help but boast."_

He jumps off the roof, and heads for his beamed note bike.

 _"He's the Music Meister_

 _U_ _nder his spell we're toast,"_

They sing as they head towards the fire, where they will indeed become toast. Did Music Meister pull an intention pun? An actual pun? Is he actually the son of the Joker and Elton John? CNN has more at 11.

Music Meister hops onto his bike and zooms off.

 _"I'm the Music Meister,_

 _I won the day now I must fly_

 _I'm the Music Meister_

 _A_ _nd I'm here to settle the scoo-ooooooore!"_

 **im probs going to do one song a chapter and end the chappie at that song.**

 **if you hadnt noticed im not taking this very seriously, but im having a hella fun time with this, so im likely going to update soon.**

 **also im going to be moving soon (to pennsylvania), so im probably going to be doing some binge writting because i feel guilty about my computer deleteing everything when i was almost done with a chapter (im sorry im so pissed about that im working towards rewritting)**


	2. Chapter 2

Batman is dealing with an internal crisis. Let people die, or go after the man who intends to enslave the entire race so he can have some spending money because his dad wont give him any?

The answer to most Americans would be go after the bad guy, but this is simply because, in the capitalist hell we all live in, this would be rational decision to get this whole fiasco over with quickly and efficiently.

But fortunately for us, Batman spent half of his life not in America, so we don't have to deal with any of that bullshit.

Batman uses his roped baterang to wrap around group of dancers, dancing to their doom as if they were a theatre student who has failed to notice the pit in time. He connects it another rope he has shot to a tower of some kind. It stops them from getting any closer.

He then climbs into the batcopter, making us believe for a moment that he would be abandoning those people, and making us think he was still affected by our strange capitalist mentality of thinking, but maybe some sympathy.

But nope, he shoots a net at them, and carries them away from the blast. One wonders why it always takes him until the last minute to save someone, or someones.

He lets them hover for a bit before dumping them on the ground like a cat that just scratched you in the face.

The villains sit up and groan, gaining their bearings back. Before they can respond, they are socked in the face by the heroes.

"Something tells me this is only the beginning of the Music Meister's evil orchestration." Batman states, longingly staring off into the distance in the direction that Music Meister went in. The longing is similar to the longing he felt for the snack packs back in the batcave.

Green Arrow walks forward while Black Canary awkwardly trails behind, being hugged and having her hair smoothed down by Blast Master. "Sounds like you could use a pal to help track him down," Green Arrow offers.

Batman takes a hold of his hand, and in that brief moment he felt the blush on his face was infinite. Sadly for the archer, Batman only unlocks the handcuffs, and leaves a pair of ear plugs in his hands. "These ear plugs will protect you from the Meister's lethal lyrics." He tosses a pair each to Black Canary and Blast Master. "The three of you should make sure these criminals are kept under wraps until the authorities arrive." He promptly grabs onto the ladder and is carried away by the batcopter.

"I could use a pal," Black Manta says weakly as he lifts himself up off the ground.

Green Arrow absent mindedly punches him as he stares at Batman leaving. "I'm not giving up that easily Batman."

Meanwhile, in some fuck ass abandoned opera house in Gotham, like literally the most obvious place anyone like him could ever pick, there is a piece of trash playing on the organ, making faces to himself, in front of a cardboard cutout audience.

Once he finishes his piece, he stand up and pulls off his cloak to reveal a fur cape that would give PETA and aneurysm. He looks to his adoring fans, who are a visual representation of his personality, and bows. "Thank you, thank you! Oh ho ho, you're too kind! With the satellite in my control, soon all the world will be singing my praise, and making me rich. Though there is one thing that could still get in my way-"

He is cut off when he notices the shadow of someone looming over him.

"You're shows about to have a long intermission, Music Meister. 20 years to life." Batman jumps down from in front of the stage light. He's probably sweating. Those things burn really hot.

"Batman, always Batman," Meister complains to himself as he runs to the organ, which he should never say around Plastic Man, lest he suffer the same fate at Clock King. "Always driving villains bats!" He slams his fingers down on the keys, and soon the entire opera house is filled with smoke. He exits, stage right, on his bar note bike, and weaves between civilians.

Batman swings after him, follow the trails of his singing. Too bad he couldn't hear what he is singing about, otherwise he would have another thing to complain about.

 _"He always has a sidekick_

 _Some boy wonder at his call_

 _His utility belt holds everything_

 _Can't find that at the mall_

 _The batmobile is super_ _fast_

 _There is no car that is surpassed."_

His music finally reaches the civilians, and they grab him by the cape and drag him down. Edna would be very disappointed in Batman.

 _"It's a good thing we've got Arkham_

 _'Cause he really drives us bats."_

The inmates of Arkham join him.

 _"Drives us bats_

 _Drives us bats_

 _He really drives us bats_

 _Bats_

 _Bats_

 _He drives us bats."_

Batman finally makes it through the crowd, and grabs onto Music Meister's bike.

It breaks off into two eighth notes, and they are forced to ride them like scooters. If this were any other time, they would have looked like a white couple taking a ride on the sidewalk on Segways.

 _"When dancing with the Batusi_

 _Or using an ar_ _r_ _ay of tools_

 _He's always got the answers_

 _He makes us look like fools."_

Batman makes the leap, yet again as if he didn't learn the first time that the Meister is one slippery son of a bitch. He misses, and falls to the ground while the Music Mesiter flies into the sky. Like how the fuck is this possible, why? How is he able to fly?

By the way, for anyone taking an English course right now, this would be symbolism, I think.

Music Meister continues on his rampage and flies by Irongate Prison.

 _"He's got no super powers_

 _He's just flying rat_

 _It's a good thing we've got Arkham_

 _'Cause he really drives us bat."_

 _"Drives us bats_ _._ _"_

The Irongate prisoners seem to know the lyrics and now Batman is royally fucked, because it's his worst nightmare. A group of evil people that sing. He can't even handle one, how is he going to handle hundreds?

 _"Worlds greatest detective."_

 _"Drives us bats."_

 _"Foiling every evil scheme."_ Gorilla Grodd, even more pissed about being forced to sing again, pouts on his tire swing.

 _"He really drives us bats_

 _Bats_

 _Bats_

 _He drives us bats."_

Music Meister shoots open the doors to Irongate Prison, which should probably be called Lintgate Prison because it took absolutely no fucking effort to blast the door open.

 _"Even without shark_ _repent_ _."_ Black Manta can't even hear himself because of the stupid fishbowl.

 _"He's tougher than he seems."_ Clock King, now in a much better mood, sings as he lifts weights, and is spotted by his new boyfriend.

 _"Other heroes often ask-"_ Blast Master would have continued singing if she wasn't cut off by the 15 people tackling her to the ground.

 _"Why is he always the top cat,"_ Black Canary finished before she is tackled down as well.

 _"He drives us bats_

 _Drives us bats_

 _Drives us bats."_

 **okay so my internets down at the moment, so the** **first three** **chapters are going to be written one after the other, i am sorry friends.**


	3. Chapter 3

Green Arrow stands on the roof, watching over the chaos. He knows he isn't amazing at hand-to-hand combat, so he tries to stay away and pick off as many people as he can. He also takes this time to remember what it was like to be a sniper back in 'Nam. Or at least what countless hours of video games told him what being a sniper back in 'Nam would be like. Yet, he gets distracted by Batman fighting off people. No homo briefly flashes through his mind, but then he hones in on Batman's rippling muscles and almost screams yes homo out loud. In fact, he feels a little bit like singing.

 _"Look at him_

 _Save the day_

 _Keeping evil far away."_

He shoots arrow after arrow, and stabs some poor fuck in the face with an arrow, probably killing him since it goes right through the eye. Non-lethal by ass, Oliver Queen, Batman doesn't want to fucking date a murderer, yet here you are, shoving arrows into peoples faces, like some dysfunctional member of society.

 _"A brave man_

 _Like no man_

 _Be my man_

 _Batman."_

Thinking he's some pre-pubescent boy in a red leotard or something, he back-flips over the mob behind him, because he's a n00b and doesn't know how to 360 no scope like a PRO. He backhands all those nerds straight back to the 50's WHERE THEY BELONG YOU ASSHOLES.

 _"If only he could love me_

 _He could love me_

 _If only he could love me_

 _Like he loves fighting villainy."_

On a roof lower down, Music Meister looks up at Green Arrow with eyes filled with theater lust. You know, when you want to someone because they don't sound like a dying wale when they sing, only to find their arm 3/4s in some girls cooch and you leave and sigh because you thought they were gay.

Obviously since Green Arrow cant see through the opaque material over his mask, he doesn't see him doing a quick change into an Elvis style costume. Not that it mattered anyways. No one can see a quick change. E.

 _"How he sings_

 _Sweet as day_

 _I could take him away_

 _A sparrow voice, harrows, my_ _beau_ _, Green Arrow"_

Music Meister curses the lazy author for that terrible last line, even though he shouts from hell that he spent an hour on it and should be thankful that he wasn't written as a straight™. All is forgiven when they're launched into a duet together. As the fissure in the ground exposing hell closes up, the author briefly mentions that when they hook up that Oliver should be taken to a hospital since he still doesn't realize that MM is there.

 _"I only he could love me,"_

 _"If only he could love me,"_

 _"If only he could love me,"_

 _"If only he could love me,"_

 _"If only he could love me,"_

 _"If only he could love me,"_

Green Arrow drags out the two last words as he dreams about what a wonderful love life he could have with Batman. You know, not rotting in the capitalist hell, but instead moving to gay hell and having 2.5 kids. He'll always feel bad for little Jimmy, they ways he's split down the middle. At least he's thankful for the white picket fence. He jumps down onto the ground while Music Meister continues singing.

 _"Like I love, villainy!"_

Green Arrow finally notices that Music Meister has been there, singing, the entire time. Like wow Green Arrow, here's a cookie.

 _"Our voices may be in tune_

 _But_ _you sir_ _don't make me swoon!"_

He takes off running to where Batman was getting quickly overwhelmed by inmates. Hell, if anyone can save him from the Elton John and the Jokers child, it has to sonic furry in a cape.

 _"Our voice's are the perfect match,_

 _B_ _ut your life I now dispatch!"_

He shoots Green Arrow with his microphone stand, which shoots bars of music, like it's totally totally plausible that beams of energy would look like that.

 _"Ooooooooh oooooooo-oooooooooh!"_ Green Arrow is knocked out by the beam the same time that Batman is finally taken out by the inmates. They both lay unconscious, just almost barely grazing fingers, almost as if they're in some cheesy action and romcom mash up.

However, on the other side of the yard, where you expect where the cheesy action romcom's and witty but loving banter would be, it's nothing but rusty-wheel-barrel-on-fire smell and people getting knocked out left and right by sonic screams.

Blast Master, who immediately regrets choosing that name after hearing Black Canary shouting the initial at her, socks some douchey guy in a jaw who comes at her. Black Canary told her to go easy on the civilians, but the guy was wearing a menemist t-shirt, so she didn't feel all too awful about it.

They were also getting quickly overwhelmed with civilians and prison inmates alike. A few of them were able to get their arms around around Blast Master, but they were quickly shucked off. Once they were, both heroes decided getting mauled by some five year old in footie pajamas wasn't worth trying to stop a giant gorilla from escaping a prison, so they decided to ditch and hide in the building, barricading the door with bodies that they were dea- nah, they're just sleeping. Look, see the one with is skull filled with lead? Just taking a nap!

After heaving body after heavy neck beard body, Blast Master doubled over trying to catch her breath. "Jesus..." she wheezed. "I... Hah... Son of a-"

"Watch it there hun, we have a TV-Y7 rating, if you let that slip we'll get canceled," Black Canary warns. She carefully takes off Blast Master's mask, and gently wiping the copious amounts of sweat, blood, and spit from her face.

"Aren't we already...? Never mind. What are we going to do now? We can't exactly leave here, can we?" Blast Master puts her hand over Black Canary's. They touch foreheads and share a sensual moment, as if they weren't surrounded by a bunch of dead gross people, but, maybe in a room with rose petals and candles. I don't know, is that romantic? Is that something that people actually do?

"Well, there is one thing we can do." Black Canary drags her off into a supply closet. She makes do with wood chips and flashlights instead, and everyone who walks by that room awkwardly speed walks away, and it's why they don't get caught for like, an hour. Until some ace guy busts in and drags them out as they scramble to pull their pants up.

 **lmao im so sorry? most of this was written during finals at like 3 am? ive been lazy, but phoenix-of-flames knows how to follow directions and reminded me that this existed.**


End file.
